Sleep, where art thou?

I can hardly believe that I’m actually alive with the sleep I’m getting. When my date of delivery was nearing, I read about new-born baby sleeping patterns. However, I don’t remember reading up what happens to the mother during this period. Either I missed it completely, or every mom was just too tired to write an account of what happens to them.

At 0 to 1 month, the baby just loves to sleep but would wake up in 2 hour intervals to drink milk. If you are a breastfeeding mom, like I am, then you would be feeding your baby every 1-3 hours round the clock! Just when you think you got your child satisfied and sleeping, and you heading for zzzz land, then that’s when you hear another cry for the baby’s next meal time.

This period I can guarantee that mothers are at their worse looks (eye bags and messy hair), worse moods (easily irritated and cranky) and worse source of normal intelligence (Hahaha! That’s what happened to me!). When my husband would ask me the simplest question, I could not give him an answer. I was too tired to think! I felt so sorry for him because at that stage of my 2-3 hour sleep a day routine, I was really too exhausted to do anything!

I have to thank God for His grace in sustaining me. I can really see why some women do fall into a postpartum depression after birth. You are physically tired and if you can’t soothe your crying baby, a mother can feel frustrated, unfit and discouraged. I know that apart from God, I can’t have the strength to go on with joy in this journey.

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My daily multivitamin to overcome these negative thoughts is prayer. Every time I try to rock my son to sleep, I call unto God to help me. When I feel so tired that I may not have enough milk supply, I declare God’s truth, “I am sufficient in Christ Jesus”. When I feel down, I am reminded to praise and thank God for the gift He has given me.

I am encouraged when mothers tell me, “Enjoy this time, enjoy your baby”. They are speaking from hindsight that this time shall soon pass. It is true, my baby seems to be changing and growing every day. I would not want to miss every milestone in his early life.

Definitely, this sleep-depriving, mind draining, and physically fatigued occupation as a parent is HARD. It can be so difficult because it requires sacrifice and commitment. In exchange there is joy to see your baby sound asleep, comforted, and growing.

I miss my sleep and wonder when I will get my 8 hour sleep schedule back… but for now, I’m going to take other moms advise — I’m going to enjoy this time and enjoy my baby!

Named with Significance

     It was my friend Marlene Suarez of CBN Asia who one day asked me a question,    “Michelle, do you know the meaning of your name?”  I honestly have never checked the meaning of my name.  She then said, “your name is like a prophetic utterance to who you could be”.  Marlene pointed out to me, that my name has the name of God in it.  “EL” means God. So I took the liberty of looking at the meaning of my name.  It is of Hebrew decent and was derived from Michael, and it means… “One who resembles God”.

    I thought to myself… Wow, that is powerful!  The gist of that conversation stuck with me.  I have decided on naming my child and future children with an intention of a prophetic blessing over their life. 

      After the knowing the gender of our baby on the fifth month, my husband asked me what should we name our son?  For some reason I was drawn to the name Joshua.  I loved the account of his life in the bible.  He was a young brave warrior, obedient to his leader which happens to be Moses, and he saw things in a different perspective — with a godly pair of eyes.  He finally led the Israelites to the promised land and on the final account about his life it says, “Israel served the Lord all the days of Joshua and all the days of the elders who survived Joshua, and had known all the deeds of the Lord which He had done for Israel.” (Joshua 24:31).  His legacy was a generation that served the Lord even after his death.

    We would want to bring up our son to love and serve God just like Joshua did. We want his name to speak that blessing upon his life. Joshua literally means “God saves”.  It is a powerful reminder of the heart and character of God.

    Of course, we named our son a much longer name — because of the long wait for a child, our first son gets 3 names which may post as  a challenge on his future documents… hehehe…  But we chose these names with the intention to speak a blessing over his life 🙂

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