Category Archives: Insights

These are heartfelt and real stories of our journey in parenthood and in marriage.  We hope that with these stories will bring you to know Jesus and the God we love and serve.  We hope you will find joy in these stories or relate to it.

Most Challenging Job in the World

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Not many may agree but I say… The most challenging job in the world is:

MOTHER

It is one of the most difficult jobs in the world. Pay is low and not a priority in taking on this career. It takes an on-call 24-hours per day job. Work peaks when “client” is sick or is cramming for exams, or when “client” is traveling out of town. The job does not allow you privacy — your bags are checked, drawers are checked and even your bathroom time is being checked. Applicant must be flexible to clean, cook, nurse, teach, be a pillow, a cheerleader, a disciplinarian, a travel agent, a porter, a driver, a day care teacher, a psychologist, and extra careers develop in due time. 
Sometimes client/s forget to say “thank you” or say “you are the best in the world”. But what keeps an applicant in that job are priceless hugs and kisses, those howling calls with a huge “Mooom or Maaa”. It’s those eyes locking without fear but filled with joy and lots of love. And the thought, “wow, I never thought I can love this much”. It’s amazing. 

❤️❤️❤️—————————-❤️❤️❤️

I remember years ago when I cried and prayed to God to make me a mother.  God knows me more than I know myself! It took 7 years before that happened.  Perhaps, God knew I was most ready when I turned 35. 

Being a mom is one of the most exciting and most self-revealing careers. I am knowing myself better and also seeing my areas of strengths and weaknesses. It’s a lot of hard work and commitment. It is a character building role. It grows patience, generosity, love, forgiveness, and grace. 

It’s definitely not easy but probably most fulfilling role for women. That’s why I cherish moms for all their love and soulful work in raising children. For God called us for this higher calling and privilege.

  
 

My Baby Led Weaning Child

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Until I had Joshua, I never heard of this BLW term. Baby Led Weaning is introducing supplementary food to babies starting 6 months. The key here is to not mash the food.  It is giving your baby the control to try and eat the food. As their slogan says “the mush stops here!”

 When Joshua turned 6 months, I prepared mashed squash for him to eat. I used a small plastic spoon to feed him, and boy did he enjoy it! I loved preparing food for him. But it always required making them into a thick stew or some thick smoothie. This worked well for Joshua. 

However, for my little girl Anna, it’s a different experience. She did not like mashed food. In fact, she gave us that weird face everytime we gave her mashed food! She did not like squash, she did not really enjoy other mashed food too. I got a bit worried because she turned 6 months and was not interested with food.

  
However, I was wrong! She was interested with food. She just wants to hold it herself, and put in her mouth to suck and nibble. I only discovered that when I gave her a piece of jack fruit and she went crazy nibbling and chewing it on her toothless gums.

  
Oh, then I tried to give her a chicken wing and she loved it! She seemed like a champ biting that wing and nibbling on it. She did not get a lot of food in her tummy, but she surely enjoyed taking some small bites out of that wing! At this point, I understand that she still gets most of her nutrition from breast milk but she too is qexploring other options with her own hands and chewing it on those little jaws! 

Come to think of it, with Josh he did not chew much at 6 months. He swallowed food more than chewed. With Anna, I notice her chewing, swallowing, or spitting out food. She seems more in control about her food! So we continued to explore!  

 
The principle on Baby Led Weaning or BLW is allowing the child to eat the same food as what the family is eating. Of course they have to be to monitored and also be given in slices or sizes that they can hold and control. So far she has not choked and many (including myself) worry about that.

I enjoy watching her eat like a little pro. It seems messy too when she eats for now, but I am more hopeful that this method will help her be less picky with food and become an independent eater too! 

Together Forever Couples Retreat

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For the first time in 9 years of marriage, Steve and I joined a marriage retreat.

We entered feeling like we have such a great marriage. We love each other and we really don’t have any problems. But as we listened to the topics and listen to our “classmates”, we both felt that we can still grow in several areas in our relationship.

 
The retreat did not make you knit pick at each other’s short comings but it brought to life the roles that each spouse plays in a marriage and in our family legacy. It reminded me how I can be great wife (not just better). I also when each of us responsibly take on our God-given roles, we can bless not only each other, but also our children too. 

  For women, our main role is to submit to our husband’s leadership, respect them, and to be their helpmate. The bible says: 

Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

I personally am still a work in progress here! I can sometimes be stubborn. But I am learning that when I submit, it pleases God. When I submit to my husband, I ultimately submit to God. 

In the retreat, I met women who never seemed to struggle with their husbands. It was there I realized that it can be possible! Also, I learned that we are a more refined version of Adam, having been made from his rib… You can say women are like a version 2.0 while Adam is first-generation made. So in many ways God made women with special features such as good home makers, multi taskers, administrative assistants, teachers and mothers… They usually can do what men can’t do.  All because women are the greatest complimentary creation for men! And since we are strong in many aspects, God reminds women to submit to the leadership of their husband.

But wait, husbands have a much larger role – to be the Lover, Leader, and Provider. The bible also states this:

“As for husbands, love your wives just like Christ loved the church and gave himself for her. That’s how husbands ought to love their wives—in the same way as they do their own bodies. Anyone who loves his wife loves himself.”

‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭5:25, 28‬ ‭CEB‬‬

 
It is very healthy for couples to go through retreats so they can get a time out from the busy routine of everyday life and nurture the marriage. It is also a time to reassess what is important and that is loving each other in a deeper and more meaningful way.

I highly recommend it to anyone who is married whether you are a few months in the club or even more than 50 years! It’s fun and also a great way to bond and date your spouse with God at the center of the experience!

 
 

 Mommy drama! 

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Being a mom is a super tough job! Joshua my toddler, who is more expressive nowadays, tests my patience on so many levels. We have arguments everyday and I get soooo tired from all the daily dramas. In a week we would probably complete a drama series for eating, for bathing, for sleeping, for waking, and for playing. 
He is a kid and tantrums come along with 2 year olds… However, Joshua is also processing his feelings of jealousy over his sister. I am seeing some regression on some milestones. Like his desire for eating has lessened and he prefers drinking milk in the bottle. He also demands for my full attention and time especially when he sees me nursing Anna. 

   
He has fully articulated his jealousy by saying “I don’t like Anna”, ” I want mommy and Anna go to Ate Kim (Anna’s nanny)”, and one of his worst crying episodes he said, “mommy, I want Joshua patay (dead) so mommy would cry.” I cried with that remark. 
 I tell him “Anna is your sister, she loves you and Mommy loves you so much. We are a family and this is God’s blessing.”  Because Joshua feels jealous, I spend most of my time with him. I only leave him shortly just to feed Anna. Every move I make he calls to check if I am still around. He calls my name almost crying and then he would smile and laugh in relief that I have not left him!

I figured this boy’s love language is time. And I do spend a lot of time with him. We are inseparable. But when he gets his tantrums and he starts screaming and crying because he wants mommy, (even if I am around)… I ask him kindly to stop crying. But his crying escalates further into screams and irritation that soon, I start losing my own patience. 

I try not to discipline him about his crying. But I realized that he was using it as a tool to communicate with almost anything. When he dislikes something he would cry. When he wants something he would cry. When he sees me walk out the door he would cry and give an all out tantrum. I try to not get angry, but I must confess seeing a crying face with screams and occasional arm slaps just gets me frustrated and angry.  This just went on for a week… 
  
I started to cry out of frustration because nothing worked. Explaining nicely and reassuring Josh by hugs and talks just does not cut it!  So I tried yelling and screaming for him to stop. I tried threatening him that if he does not stop, I would leave. None of it worked. 😦  For one week it was this non stop cycle of crying and we end up fighting because Josh would fall into a tantrum even when I am giving him full attention (except during feedings). 
I asked friends to pray for me. I cried to the Lord and asked “how can I be a better mom to my son?”  I was so discouraged that even when Steve says, “you are doing a good job”, I still feel I am failing.
Then I remembered excerpts from a parenting seminar I attended. It was discussed when a child who deliberately disobeys or disrespects his or her parent they should be disciplined. I must admit, I get lazy to do this because it requires so much to get into a room with a defiant 2 yr old who will not submit to be disciplined. 

The bible says: 
Proverbs 29:15 The rod and reproof give wisdom,but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.


I knew I had to correct Joshua’s behavior and work on his attitude. I had to teach him that he can’t always cry his way. I also had to reassure him that he must respect his parents because we love him.  I disciplined him and took time to explain. Joshua immediately stopped crying. In fact when we got out of the room, his mood changed and started playing.
  
I learned that I really should exercise discipline when the need arises and teach my son.  Otherwise, I will develop a bad habit in his character. It’s almost a week since his last tantrum after the discipline.  Joshua has been speaking instead of crying. 

How do I know that he understood what we did in the discipline room? He plays with his avenger toys and then he would pretend one would be crying. Later he will have the other toy say – “stop crying… If you don’t stop, you get a spank”. 
To learn more about biblical discipline I am suggesting you this link. Read more:

http://www.gotquestions.org/disciplining-children.html

Memory Verse- John 3:16

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I felt challenged by a friend who is a missionary to teach Joshua some memory verse. She gave me a lesson plan they use in Vacation Bible school or Sunday School. The first on the list is John 3:16.

For God so loved the world He gave his only Son that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.

I thought, wow that’s going to be a long one. I read the different styles. Some use gestures like sign language, other methods are using color book to describe key words. I thought, il do the color one because the hand movement was more challenging.

So that morning, I got gold paper, red paper, blue paper, and white paper. Then, I got glue and several round cylinders used for creams. Fortunate for me I had about 5 of those.  So I cut the colored paper and asked Joshua to help me paste them on the cylinder tops.  And here we got the following:

1. GOLD – this represents GOD. Joshua placed eyes because God sees everything. Gold is glory and also reminds us that Heaven’s streets are gold.  

  

2. RED – This represents LOVE. It also reminds us of what Jesus has done was shed his blood on the cross because of His great love for us.

 

3. BLUE – This represents “the world”

 
4. CROSS – This represents Jesus and to tell us God gave Jesus. This part is “He gave Jesus”

 

5. Happy face – This represents the person who believes. Joshua says this is him.  The key word is BELIEVE. 

So I say: “so whoever …”
Then Joshua says: “Believes” 
I say: “in Jesus will not…”
then Joshua says: “die”
I say “but have eternal…”
Joshua says: “life”.
 

So we did this again and again… Soon to my surprise, Joshua can say the memory verse by using the illustration. I am amazed that my two year old can memorize this verse!  When verses like these are remembered, these become foundations to my little one’s mind and heart. He will remember that God loves him and his faith in Jesus gives him eternal life! That is a fundamental truth that will guard his heart from many lies. God is love and He loves us! 
  

  
  
  

I want to go to heaven

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One of my heart’s desire and prayer is for my children to believe in Jesus in their youth. I take seriously the command of the bible in Deuteronomy 6:5-7

  
Joshua and I have conversations about God and Jesus because we get to read the toddler’s bible. We get to explore who God is through the stories in the Old and New Testaments. His favorite stories are Moses who prayed to God and the Red Sea opened, David and Goliath, the birth of Jesus, the Cross and Jesus’ Resurrection.

At night he sleeps to this song which his nanny has taught him -“Kay Buti Buti mo Panginoon” (God, you are sooo good). He can sing it too. 

But as of recent, our conversations have become more interesting. I explained to Joshua that heaven is a beautiful place and Jesus is in Heaven. He has prepared heaven for those who believe In Jesus and ask Jesus to come into their hearts. So I told him to ask Jesus to come in his heart and he said it… “Jesus, come in my heart”.  Then for how many days since our conversation… He has been asking about Jesus and he has been saying, “I want to go to Jesus. I want to go to heaven.” My response is, “me too, I want to go to heaven and to Jesus”.

 
The bible tells us that heaven is not only beautiful and perfect… It is also a place where we are in complete fellowship with God.

And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, “Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He will dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself will be among them, and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away.” (‭Revelation‬ ‭21‬:‭3-4‬ NASB)

Joshua seems really excited to go to heaven because he was asking if we can ride the car and go there. I told him, we have to wait for Jesus to come and to take us to heaven. 

I know many probably freak out with this kind of conversation. But, if you believe in God and His Word, then heaven is where we all should desire to go. Even as young as 2 years old, my little boy is beginning to desire that too! (Who desires to go hell?  Not many I hope!)

In my quiet hours, I am thanking God for the opportunity of being able to share these moments with Joshua. It made me think, if parents do not teach God and their faith with their kids, then the world will teach them many confusing and (often) cruel things. 

I pray by God’s grace, I can raise my children in the fear and love of the Lord. My other prayer is that they grow up committed to love and serve the Lord, and influence others to do the same. 

Thank you for being daddy!

My husband, Steve, is a public servant and he is a very busy man.  So most of the day, I spend with the kids taking care of their needs, teaching and disciplining my toddler (because I catch the moments of disobedience). However, despite his very busy schedule and the stress that comes with his job, he makes it a point to spend time with the kids every day. I really appreciate that about him.

He is the type of dad that wants to be the first one to make his children experience something different or new in their life.

   
  He likes to buy gifts and play, but he is also stern in discipline.

  
When he gets home, he likes spending time being in one room  doing nothing (ok, maybe watching TV).

  
He also likes to hug and kiss the kids.  He loves holding them!

  
When we are away, he keeps saying, “I miss you guys, and I keep dreaming of Joshua”.

The most stressful part about being married to Steve is when any of the kids get sick. Even just a slight fever can be like the worst has come!  He just wants all of us to be well and happy!

  
As a father, he prays for his children.  He lays his hands on them and releases blessings in their lives.  So I know that our heavenly father is listening and will grant his prayers.

  
It seemed like a blink of an eye, that time in our life when we prayed to the Lord for our children.  I recall the day when we found out we were pregnant and weeks later, that first pregnancy was going to be terminated because it was ectopic.  The night before the operation, Steve embraced me to sleep with his hands clasping mine, as I cried to the Lord for the loss.  He was crying too because we both wanted to be this baby’s parent.  The Lord in His faithfulness, on the 7th year of our waiting, made us parents.  Steve was finally a legitimate father. A daddy to Joshua, and now a daddy to our little Anna.

  
I thank the Lord for the privilege he is giving my husband to be a father.  I thank God because Steve is experiencing a different kind of love.  He is experiencing another dimension of joy.  Most of all it is making him know God more as our father.

This day, I thank God for all fathers, who make themselves available for their children.  To dads who are ever present, who provide for their children, who love and discipline their own kids, who prays for their children, and who thinks about their future.  God bless you and may God increase your joy! I love and thank you Steve, for being that kind of daddy.

Happy Father’s Day! 

Group Schooling

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I am praying God will enable me to homeschool my children. I have seen many of my mommy friends who do home school and their children are intelligent, well mannered, and highly sociable kids. They are able to carry conversations with adults and with other kids. 

When I was in Manila, I met other homeschooling moms. They were doing a group school in CCF. Moms take turns to teach homeschool kids different topics. I was excited to go and observe. They taught values, alphabets, and guided play to toddlers within 2-3 yrs old.  

Values – they take a bible reading and teach a life application from it. That day, they taught about God’s house and how to behave in church. So each child was made line up and pretend they were going to church and sit in their places quietly. 

Alphabets- they teach one alphabet at a time. So this time it was the letter V.  They had the kids paste pasta over the letter V. This helps in memory retension. 

   
Then, on the guided play, they had a game about frogs and how each frog jumped in the water. The game had a little math too! They had to count how many frogs we’re left. Then at the end each one had to make their frogs using a spotted green plate. 

  
I really got encouraged seeing my other mommy friends homeschool their kids. It also affirmed that what Joshua and I are doing at home is pre schooling already. I am praying for grace and patience to do this. My desire is to really homeschool Joshua.

I’m seeing the unspoken fulfillment of each mother in this group. I dream for this kind of parenting in Gensan and Sarangani too!
  

 

First Mom & Son benefit

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We just did our very first fashion show today in Fairmont Hotel Makati called “Lola, Mommy, and Me”.    I’m actually so happy we agreed to join the ABS-CBN Bantay Bata 163 Benefit Show for several reasons:

1. This benefit will change lives among young children who need help. I met some of the kids that Bantay Bata has helped, including  the recipients of open heart surgeries. They are living a healthier and fuller life than before. It’s great to be part of something that can make a difference.

2. One of my closest friends is the director of this ABS CBN Foundation’s Fashion Show. Rain Ramas hails from General Santos City and is not only a great designer, but also an excellent producer. He worked hard to make this fashion show a success– the brands that supported were Rajo Laurel, F&F, Uniqlo and other Rustan’s brands.

3. Gina Lopez, the woman behind the foundation is one person I admire. She is passionate about changing this country one community at a time. Our partnership in Sarangani is growing and has helped communities earn through Eco-tourism. 

  
4. The make up artist I will be working with is an up and coming make up star, Jag Irineo. She also is a native of Gensan and does amazing make up!  In fact, the make up she did on me was complimented over and over. 

5. This is a special mommy and son experience. Joshua was a natural. He was not afraid of the stage. We walked that long ramp with ease. It was a good moment for us and it was fun!   What an honor and privilege indeed! 

 

The Hairy Story

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If you are a  breastfeeding mother this story is something you can relate to. You have been breastfeeding your baby over 3 months when suddenly you wake up and your long hair strands are found on your pillow, on your sheets, and even on your baby’s neck! By the time you hit the shower, your shampoo seems to make your hair fall off! The look on your hair brush is just so unpleasant. You even feel embarrassed about it that you hide from your husband. You then ask, “Why on earth is this happening to me?”

  
It’s a normal phenomena for breastfeeding moms to start having hair loss. It is also called post partum hair loss. But not to worry because the baby hairs will be growing. Hormone levels will adjust to normal and the hair loss will stop. In the meantime, moms should eat well and drink B complex.  

As for my story, I made a decision to just cut my hair and sport a new hair do. Thanks to my sister in law Pria and her friend Stefano of 2 GO for introducing me to International hairstylist Laurent Herbert. He styles for celebrities and royalties. He also consults for salons and help make their businesses profitable. Laurent was available to style me and so I feel so privileged to be in good hands!  Anna went with me to his private Salon in LH Hair Science Lab in Bonifacio Global City.

  

My long, thick black hair was going to be chopped off into a pixie cut. This hairdo will be a new look and also a means to saying good bye to my long messy falling hair! 

 
A new look and a bit of pampering is good for mommies. As a mom, I get so busy running after my children and nurturing them that I can forget about myself. Once in a while moms deserve that break. Thank God for a supportive husband who even chose the kind of short hairstyle I should go for! I am one happy mommy!!! 🙂