Category Archives: Insights

These are heartfelt and real stories of our journey in parenthood and in marriage.  We hope that with these stories will bring you to know Jesus and the God we love and serve.  We hope you will find joy in these stories or relate to it.

Unspoiling the Babe…

It’s quite interesting that a newborn baby can be a little brat in the making. Well I did not know that until our pediatrician met Joshua for his 1st month check up. As she held him to weigh and measure him, he cried and cried. He turned red with a mighty angry fit. My reaction was a bit of a panic to soothe him so he would stop. Then our doctor says, ” looks like you have spoiled your baby”.

A month old baby considered “spoiled”. Are you kidding me? I could not believe my ears, and ouchie for my ego… Could I have spoiled my baby?

The doctor asked if I gave my baby milk the moment he cried. And ooppsss… I am guilty of that. I just want my baby to be relieved when he is in discomfort and cries. She further explained that babies are smarter than we think. They understand the principle of “action for every reaction”. So when Josh cries I feed him immediately. So now he associates milk with crying.

The doctor advised me to restrain the feeding to every 2 hrs instead of every 30 mins or every hour. She also said, it is ok to let the baby cry… “It’s good for their lungs!” So I took the doctor’s advise.

Joshua had to be trained on a semi-scheduled feeding. We had cry out sessions running 20 minutes… And boy, it felt like forever! The outcome however is so worth it. Joshua became calmer, more amiable, and obedient.

Now, he hardly has his tantrums. We can travel and if he starts showing signs of crying, I just talk to him and he calms down. He has become such a good baby because this early, he is learning he can’t get everything he demands.

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There are many things to learn as a parent on loving your child enough to teach them. I never realized that spoiling can start very early…

My mother-in-law would get Joshua in the morning and give him tummy time. She would shut her door so I don’t hear my baby cry. But Joshua would cry when he is placed on his tummy. She would put him on his back and he would cry. Then turn him on his tummy and he would cry with high pitched pissed off voice. She was patient until he stopped. I have to say, Joshua now enjoys tummy time and is doing his version of crawling before he turned 2 months! My mother-in-law is instrumental for this milestone!

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The bible says so, “train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old, he will not depart from it” -Proverbs 22:6

Daddy time

Yesterday was my hubby’s birthday. Usually he is quite particular about taking our little one out because he is only 2 months. However, yesterday was different. Daddy wanted little Joshua with him.

We went to church, we had lunch, spent quiet time as a family, bathed Joshua, and brought him to dinner with us. My husband, Steve, on his birthday wanted the most important people in his life to be around him. I really felt good that he made that his priority.

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We make it a point that there will be “daddy’s time” everyday between Steve and baby Josh. When Steve gets home from work, he hurries to shower or freshen up just to hold and play with Joshua. They have conversations ( Joshua responds by cooing), they have play time… And at night, daddy Steve does family snuggles before he goes to bed.

Joshua coos and laughs, crawls on Steve’s chest, and finds rest sitting on Steve’s legs. I really enjoy watching them bond.

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Yesterday, Steve decided on his birthday to read scripture during lunch over his parents and siblings and over us… I look forward to that day when Joshua does that as well.

I prayed over Steve that God would mold him to be the best father to Joshua and the best husband for me. I declare God’s favor over his life and that he will be a godly example to me and to Joshua. He is the leader in our home and we will serve God together.

Being a good father is not inborn. It needs a heart attuned to God that is humble enough to be changed and even broken. It is a commitment that a person makes in his life to raise his family in the fear of the Lord. This is why as a wife it is important I pray for my husband, the father of my child. I release him to God and I watch God move in his life. As I love and submit to Steve, my son will grow, love, respect his father.

This proverb is a reminder to Steve and I on how we are to rear our child.

Proverbs 4:10-13
My child,listen to me and do as I say,
and you will have a long, good life.
I will teach you wisdom’s ways
and lead you in straight paths.
When you walk, you won’t be held back;
when you run, you won’t stumble.
Take hold of my instructions; don’t let them go.
Guard them, for they are the key to life.

Precious Milk

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Having spoken to several moms I learned that there is a lack of advocacy on breast feeding. Here is a list of common myths versus truths on breastfeeding and breast milk:

1. “I don’t have milk”. – Yes its true some mothers are not dripping milk before the birth of their baby. Some won’t have milk until it is stimulated by their baby. Milk naturally comes out 3 to 5 days after the first latch. Let it be known that 99% of mothers have breast milk.

2. “Milk has not come in yet, my baby will die of hunger”. – The baby from the womb has enough nutrients from the placenta and is full for the next 3 days. The tummy of the baby is as small as a cashew nut and will not need a lot of milk just yet. In the next 3 days, what comes out of the breast is the COLOSTRUM. Don’t let the nurses or midwives push you to feed your baby formula or glucose water. Instead, allow your baby to latch and suck on your breast. The breast milk will flow the more the baby has contact with it.

3. “You can’t store breast milk, so I just let my milk drip on my shirt and wash it after”. Oh No! Breast milk is precious! You can manually express it in a bowl or use a breast pump to extract breast milk. If you store milk in the refrigerator it can last for 7 days. If you store it in a single door freezer it can last 2-4 weeks, double door 1-2 months, and a separate freezer chest can keep the milk up to 6 months.The expressed stored milk can be given to your baby when you are away.

4. “I don’t have enough milk so my baby is not satisfied and cries because of hunger.” – If your baby has wet or soiled diapers, and is gaining weight, then for sure you are giving enough. I had to learn this… Not all crying mean that babies are hungry. But if you offer your breast at every cry, the baby who is naturally accustomed to sucking will take your breast even if not hungry. Watch out also if your baby is fussy because of gas build up due to over feeding… or if your baby spits out milk, it may be overfeeding too.

I realized it is also psychological. If you think you do not have, then even your milk supply gets depleted. If you think that you have, you maybe surprised at the ounces that you can get when you pump.

Other tips to let milk flow includes: Imagining your baby crying or actually hearing your baby cry can influence your body to flow milk. Also I have tried wetting my feet with the faucet and the sensation of dripping water also influences a let down (this i find most interesting). Expressing using a breast pump before or after breast feeding will signal your body to produce more milk.

If you still feel inadequate then I suggest you load up on wholegrain and multigrain. I eat oatmeal every morning and that does me good. Also malunggay in soups, clam shell soup, and different juices help increase my milk. If you can’t eat malunggay you can buy malunggay capsules. I was suggested by my friend to take Natalac and it has done wonders for me…

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Most of all, don’t give up or think negatively about breast feeding. If you feel frustrated, calm down and pray. God promises sufficiency in our every need.

Power of a praying parent

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I love Stormie Omartian books. I have read “Power of a Praying Wife”, and “Power of a Praying Woman”. It is filled with heartwarming personal stories and helps the reader express specific prayers and declare specific scripture verses.

In December 2011, I received another of Stormie’s books from a random exchange gift. At that time I was still childless. After seeing the book, “Power of a Praying Parent”, I took it as an advance notice from God that I will become one someday. When I learned I was pregnant, I started reading this book and praying for my child even when he was in my womb.

This book leads the parent to start praying for the different aspects of a child’s life. It includes your child’s health, emotional maturity, intelligence, freedom from fears, including his circle of friends and even their future spouse.

What I am realizing more and more is that children are really “loaned” to parents by God. We are just stewards of their life. I cannot ensure to protect my child 24/7, but His Heavenly Father can. So, instead of worrying, I lift my child up in prayer.

Now that I have Joshua, we make it a daily habit to pray each morning. He usually wakes around 5am – 6am. While he is tucked in my arms, I start praying out loud. We thank God for another day, we thank God for his goodness and faithfulness. Then we pray for our loved ones and our household. I also pray that Joshua will know the Lord, and will love and obey Him.

I look forward to the day I hear him utter his own prayer and converse with God.

Deuteronomy 11:18-22 “So commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these words of mine. Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. Teach them to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates, so that as long as the sky remains above the earth, you and your children may flourish in the land the Lord swore to give your ancestors. “Be careful to obey all these commands I am giving you. Show love to the Lord your God by walking in his ways and holding tightly to him.

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Just like Hannah

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“I want to have grand kids, so double time!” that was part of the speech of my father-in-law during our wedding years ago. It was everyone’s well wish and expectation for us to conceive and have “mini-me’s” running around. But it was not an easy journey for us.

After a year of marriage and not conceiving, I visited the OB-GYNE to find out what can be done for me to get pregnant. My ultrasound would show I have polycystic ovaries. The doctor said that the cyst was small and it should not bother us. The only solution also to this syndrome is to just get pregnant. It seemed like an easy solution, but it was far from easy for us.

I remained very hopeful. My husband and I prayed, fasted, believed that we would get pregnant. Different options were given to us, pills, exercise, following a menstrual cycle for days of contact… however the months became years and I began losing faith.

I admit that I was getting disappointed with God. I would cry every time my period would come. It pierced my heart when people would ask why we were not getting pregnant and received their suggestions on what we should do. There was a year that everyone around me was getting pregnant (even my own dog!)… but I remained barren. It came to a point that I needed to blame someone why I was not conceiving… I started to blame my husband because at that time he was not open to get himself checked. I wondered why God was not granting our request… I was getting bitter towards God that I’d say “I don’t care if I don’t get pregnant”. Truthfully that was the total opposite. I did care.

God never gave up on me though. God was working on me, stretching my faith muscles. Through His Word He reminded me of Hannah. For years she was barren and mocked for being childless. She too cried to God. Her account is found in the book of 1 Samuel 1.
v 10 “Hannah was in deep anguish, crying bitterly as she prayed to the Lord.”

But after Hannah cried to the Lord, she left this concern in faith, not in doubt or bitterness. After Eli (the priest) saw her in the temple crying he pronounced a blessing to her and she left no longer depressed.
v 18 “Then she went back and began to eat again, and she was no longer sad”
The bible accounts that “the Lord remembered her plea”; v 20 “and in due time she gave birth to a son. She named him Samuel, for she said, “I asked the Lord for him.”

I had to learn to trust God’s plan and timing for everything and for everyone. I was becoming impatient and seeding doubt. Thank God for friends who never stopped praying for us, and that encouraged me to believe.

In 2010, my twin sister gave birth to her 3rd child, Jonathan David (JD). I was with her at the labor room, and I had the privilege to see her baby right after delivery. I held her little one in my arms, and began feeling hopeful again of God’s promise to me and my husband. The week after, I took a step of faith of seeing a specialist that would assess our situation. I was diagnosed with Endometriosis. The week after, I was wheeled in the operating room for a laparoscopic procedure to remove the adhesions and polyps in my uterus and the cysts on my ovaries.

I was a Stage IV Endometriosis patient. In short, infertile. But that did not stop me to believe that God can open my womb. My husband began to follow the footsteps of Isaac who prayed for his wife. Genesis 25:21 “Isaac pleaded with the Lord on behalf of his wife, because she was unable to have children. The Lord answered Isaac’s prayer, and Rebekah became pregnant with twins.”

Okay, we did not have twins. But three months after the procedure we were pregnant! I cried for joy for the Lord remembered me. However, on our 5th week check up, the doctor could not find the sac. My blood (hcg) test says I am definitely pregnant, the pregnancy test shows 2 lines. But there was no sac.

We started to pray, and I believed God will show us a miracle that the next test we will see the baby in the uterus. We flew to Manila to have myself checked there… The findings — possible ectopic pregnancy.

The doctor explained to me that I had to undergo another operation again. She also told me straight that I can lose one of my fallopian tubes if the baby implanted in it. I was crushed and my husband was too. Both of us were crying the night before getting confined in the hospital. I was grieving to lose this child. That night I could not sleep, I kept talking to God. “Lord, please tell my child how much I want to be his/her mom.” I was talking to my baby and telling my baby “I love you, you made me excited to be a mom. I already miss you even if we have never met. You must know I want to have you so much.”

Joy Mendoza, my close friend and discipler called and cried with me… She said, “I am so sorry Mit. How are you feeling?” In my heart, I was not angry at God. I told her, “I know this is God’s will. The mere fact he made me pregnant is already a miracle. I am not disappointed with Him.” I worried about losing my fallopian tube, but the doctor assured me that I can still get pregnant with just one tube.

That day in June 2011, I had another operation to remove the fetus before it raptures my fallopian tube.

After the procedure, when I opened my eyes in the recovery room, my husband told me this “Guess what… the baby was found in the abdomen, it implanted and found blood supply there. But the sac could not sustain so it was ready to be removed. So, they did not cut your fallopian tube. Your reproductive organs are all intact.”

When I heard that I had peace. I thanked God for being so gracious, and for giving us a child that was so considerate to give way for another baby in the future by implanting in the abdomen rather than in the tube.

Like Hannah, I cried and grieved before the Lord, but God gave me extra grace and an increased faith. I had more confidence than before that I would conceive in God’s perfect time. Then, I moved on everyday believing that I would receive. In fact, there was no pain in my heart about the loss. I felt God’s presence and firm love for me and my future.

And true to God’s promise… I conceived again in April 2012. This is now our precious baby Joshua. God is indeed faithful, His love never fails. This is why I claim these verses as my life statements: “Everything is possible to him who believes” (Mark 9:23) and “For nothing is impossible with God” (Luke 1:37)

Pregnant by faith

Pregnant by faith

Red, Black, and White

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When I was younger, I loved Arts and Crafts. I liked to paint, use pastel colors, and imagine art work. But as you get older, you usually don’t work on those projects anymore, and you certainly get rusty. In fact, it kindda blinds your artistic eyes.

When I was preparing the baby room, it was my friend Amanda, who asked if I had made a crib mobile (hanging moving toys) for Joshua. I told her, “no”. It was because I was too lazy to make those hanging toys and it would again require for me to work with my hands and conceptualize what to make. Newborns are fascinated with red, black, and white colors since their eyesight are still developing. Amanda, suggested that I try making a mobile with those colors. What I did instead was buy a mobile with colors that were dominant on red, white and black. Like I said, I was too lazy make one, so I bought.

Just a week ago, another girlfriend of mine, Jill, came to see me and I showed her the baby room. She told me again that Joshua’s brain stimulation is increased if I put red, black, and white designs on the ceiling. She told me, it is easy because all I needed to do was buy cartolina paper and cut out designs and stick it on the ceiling. She was the second person who insisted I get into the red, black and white brain stimulation thingy.

This time around, I did not have an excuse… I now need to get my hands dirty and work on something artistic. So, I went to National Bookstore and bought the cartolina paper, paste, and double sided tape. When I got home I looked at the ceiling, and boy did the ceiling above his crib suddenly feel so long and wide. I felt overwhelmed with the project.

I began cutting circles, triangles, squares, rectangles. It was an exercise that was unlocking my childhood artistic eyes. Once you start, you can really get glued to it. The most difficult part was sticking the design on the ceiling. It made me wonder the geniuses of Michaelangelo and his counterparts when they were painting ceilings. I was getting disoriented a lot when I was putting the design on the ceiling.

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Finally, I stuck the design up on the ceiling. Its not perfect, alright… but it is worth the shot. The most priceless scene I enjoy is seeing my little one staring interestingly on the artwork I have made. This makes me feel like an accomplished mommy artist. That is what matters most to me now… I can now say that it is true that mothers would go out of their comfort zone and do things that are good for their babe.
The stimulating ceiling

Feeding the BEST

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I’ve heard it, you have heard it… Humans are probably the only specie that would offer their babies another specie’s milk. That is probably not true for all humans, but that line was the introduction of the Lactation Consultant during our breastfeeding class.  I asked my twin sister to accompany me to a breastfeeding class to help me prepare for my baby.  It was a real eye-opener and these are some of the truths I learned from the class about Breastfeeding:

1. It is complete.  Did you know that breast milk is a complete super food? You don’t need to supplement because it is sufficient with nutrients and vitamins that our little one needs.  It’s like manna from heaven, the perfect health food for babies.

2. It immunizes. A child that breastfeed for 6 months and drinks breast milk up to 2 years old have immunization from many diseases up to 12 years of age.  Even the COLOSTRUM which appears 3-5 days before the milk is a special super antibody provided specially for the baby. All this is produced by the body naturally.

3. It is good for the tummy. No constipation for newborns that feed on breast milk. It easily digests and is safer for the baby’s stomach. Constipation usually happens with formula.  Also your baby will not experience lactose intolerance (this refers usually to an allergy to cow’s milk).

4. It is good for bonding. A mother and child develops a stronger bond when they breastfeed. They spend more time together thus providing the child a sense of security, comfort, and love.

5. It makes mommy sexy. Two benefits go to the mommy when she breast feeds.  First, she can get her pre-pregnancy abdomen quicker. As the mom breast feeds her uterus contracts and goes back to its normal size sooner than those who don’t.  The second benefit is breastfeeding can be a natural birth control.  It delays the return of the menstrual cycle which protects the mom from getting pregnant again (but this is not a guarantee, so still be careful!)

6. It is convenient.  There are no need of bottles that crowd the baby travel bag.  There is no need to carry along water and powdered milk (that makes the bag heavy). Also no sleepless nights for daddy in trying to mix formula into the bottle.  The mom is all that is needed!

7. It saves MONEY. Do you know how much a family saves if the mother breastfeeds?  The family can save in 2 years more than P200,000.00 !  This is the part of the class where the husbands mouth drops, and looks intently at their wives to encourage them to breast feed.  Then the Lactation consultant gives the wives a come back ” This is why you can demand from your husband vacations in exchange of the savings!”  Hahahha… that is true!

I am amazed at how God provides for us.  Naturally, breast milk is the BEST milk with all the benefits that other milk cannot completely provide.  This encouraged me to also breastfeed my son by God’s grace.  Now that I know, why would I not provide my child the very BEST?

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Genesis 49:25 (NLT)

May the God of your father help you;
    may the Almighty bless you
with the blessings of the heavens above,
    and blessings of the watery depths below,
    and blessings of the breasts and womb.

Sleep, where art thou?

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I can hardly believe that I’m actually alive with the sleep I’m getting. When my date of delivery was nearing, I read about new-born baby sleeping patterns. However, I don’t remember reading up what happens to the mother during this period. Either I missed it completely, or every mom was just too tired to write an account of what happens to them.

At 0 to 1 month, the baby just loves to sleep but would wake up in 2 hour intervals to drink milk. If you are a breastfeeding mom, like I am, then you would be feeding your baby every 1-3 hours round the clock! Just when you think you got your child satisfied and sleeping, and you heading for zzzz land, then that’s when you hear another cry for the baby’s next meal time.

This period I can guarantee that mothers are at their worse looks (eye bags and messy hair), worse moods (easily irritated and cranky) and worse source of normal intelligence (Hahaha! That’s what happened to me!). When my husband would ask me the simplest question, I could not give him an answer. I was too tired to think! I felt so sorry for him because at that stage of my 2-3 hour sleep a day routine, I was really too exhausted to do anything!

I have to thank God for His grace in sustaining me. I can really see why some women do fall into a postpartum depression after birth. You are physically tired and if you can’t soothe your crying baby, a mother can feel frustrated, unfit and discouraged. I know that apart from God, I can’t have the strength to go on with joy in this journey.

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My daily multivitamin to overcome these negative thoughts is prayer. Every time I try to rock my son to sleep, I call unto God to help me. When I feel so tired that I may not have enough milk supply, I declare God’s truth, “I am sufficient in Christ Jesus”. When I feel down, I am reminded to praise and thank God for the gift He has given me.

I am encouraged when mothers tell me, “Enjoy this time, enjoy your baby”. They are speaking from hindsight that this time shall soon pass. It is true, my baby seems to be changing and growing every day. I would not want to miss every milestone in his early life.

Definitely, this sleep-depriving, mind draining, and physically fatigued occupation as a parent is HARD. It can be so difficult because it requires sacrifice and commitment. In exchange there is joy to see your baby sound asleep, comforted, and growing.

I miss my sleep and wonder when I will get my 8 hour sleep schedule back… but for now, I’m going to take other moms advise — I’m going to enjoy this time and enjoy my baby!

Named with Significance

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     It was my friend Marlene Suarez of CBN Asia who one day asked me a question,    “Michelle, do you know the meaning of your name?”  I honestly have never checked the meaning of my name.  She then said, “your name is like a prophetic utterance to who you could be”.  Marlene pointed out to me, that my name has the name of God in it.  “EL” means God. So I took the liberty of looking at the meaning of my name.  It is of Hebrew decent and was derived from Michael, and it means… “One who resembles God”.

    I thought to myself… Wow, that is powerful!  The gist of that conversation stuck with me.  I have decided on naming my child and future children with an intention of a prophetic blessing over their life. 

      After the knowing the gender of our baby on the fifth month, my husband asked me what should we name our son?  For some reason I was drawn to the name Joshua.  I loved the account of his life in the bible.  He was a young brave warrior, obedient to his leader which happens to be Moses, and he saw things in a different perspective — with a godly pair of eyes.  He finally led the Israelites to the promised land and on the final account about his life it says, “Israel served the Lord all the days of Joshua and all the days of the elders who survived Joshua, and had known all the deeds of the Lord which He had done for Israel.” (Joshua 24:31).  His legacy was a generation that served the Lord even after his death.

    We would want to bring up our son to love and serve God just like Joshua did. We want his name to speak that blessing upon his life. Joshua literally means “God saves”.  It is a powerful reminder of the heart and character of God.

    Of course, we named our son a much longer name — because of the long wait for a child, our first son gets 3 names which may post as  a challenge on his future documents… hehehe…  But we chose these names with the intention to speak a blessing over his life 🙂

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God does move mountains!

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Initially, I was planning to deliver the baby in manila, so I saw my sister’s OB-GYNE when I was about 5 months pregnant. She looked through my medical history and decided its appropriate for me to get a Congenital Abnormality Scan (CAS). This scan is done via 3D or 4D ultrasound to see if the baby has any problems or is in the pink of health. It will be the time also that one would know the gender of the baby and to see a bit of the baby’s features. With lots of joy on this pregnancy I was excited to see my baby.

I asked my sister-in-law, Pria to join me for this momentous occasion. We were both giddy and excited to see the baby.

The scan is about 30 minutes long. The doctor shows us via screens in the room the baby in the uterus. My baby was moving, kicking, and responding to our voices! I was smiling from ear to ear. Then the doctor asks, “do you want to guess the gender?” … I said a quick prayer “Sana Lord, boy” … But whatever is the gender, I’d be happy. My prayer was granted, when the doctor revealed we are having a baby boy. Suddenly, I can hear Pria with tears in her eyes reporting via phone what we both could see to my husband… We were so elated!

After checking, my baby has complete fingers, complete toes, no cleft lip… Then the doctor became silent. She kept going back to the heart. Then she told me, “you need to see your doctor”. I asked her what she could see, and she refused to explain to me. In minutes she called another sonologist to come in our room, and she checked my tummy again… They both concurred that their findings was the same. I did not know what they saw, but I knew it was not normal.

Having our celebratory merienda at Landmark, i opened the results and the finding was a probable DEXTROCARDIA. I was not sure what it meant but cardia is definitely heart… I researched it and it meant that the heart was not pointing to the left and the possibility of other organs to be on the opposite side as well… As I told my husband who was at the province at that time, he worried so much and asked God, “Lord, why?” He was upset and he did not want me to be disappointed with this circumstance. I laughed and told him, “I am not worried, we are on God’s special lane, I know He will do something.”
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That night, I felt God assuring me He is in control. I talked to Pria and told her not to tell anyone because I believed God will do something about this. We kept it a secret until the prescribed 2D echo doppler has been done. The only thing is that procedure can only be done a month after. So it gave us a month to pray and practice faith. We entrusted this update to only a few friends who prayed with us.

I embraced this verse and declared it over my baby “Every good and perfect gift comes from above, coming down from the Father of heavenly lights who does not change like shifting shadows” (James 1:17). I kept saying out loud, my baby is a perfect gift from God, so he will be perfect! I surrendered, trusted and believed in this promise.

Sept 7, 2012 we got a schedule with the head of pediatric cardio in St. Luke’s global for a 2D echo doppler test. Dr Jonas del Rosario was very cool and made me and hubby relaxed. He was not going to say anything until he sees the heart of the baby. Holding hands, my husband and I prayed and thank God for this baby and the test. In about 20 minutes of scanning, he shows us.. “Look, his heart is pointing left, his valves are all normal, his stomach is on the left, your baby is normal.” Looking at the screen and seeing my baby’s heart beating, I smiled! All I could say was “thank you Jesus, thank you Doc, thank you Jesus!”

We experienced a miracle that day. God is in full control. Out loud, I would declare like a little kid, “I knew it! I knew that God would do something”. Indeed He has, and with increased joy, I believe God still moves mountains in this modern-day. He moved my son’s heart… He can move anything!